God's Rubies

God looked at His creation and saw something missing. He made the plants, stars, animals, and a male, but it was not completed yet. God looked around and said “Aha! I know what the world needs-a woman!”

It was a woman that fixed man’s problem of aloneness (Genesis 2:18-25). He could have made more animals. He could have made a golf course. He could have made a sports team, but he made a woman. It was a woman that was created not from the head of man, nor from his foot, but from his rib, indicating their equality (Genesis 2:22). Although the world believes women are hated, disvalued, and unloved, it is a wrong view of women that presents false impressions like these. Feministic attitudes are unscriptural as are misogynistic ones. God views women as valuable treasures.  

The Bible speaks much about women. Not only does it speak much about them, it reveres them too. The words “woman” and “women” occur 546 times in the Bible. These precious treasures come with beautiful descriptions written by the finger of God: 

• “A gracious woman retaineth honour: and strong men retain riches” (Proverbs 11:16).  

• “A virtuous woman is a crown to her husband: but she that maketh ashamed is as rottenness in his bones” (Proverbs 12:4).

• "Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the LORD” (Proverbs 18:22).

• “But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price… Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.” (1 Peter 3:4, 7).

God wrote about some powerful illustrations of these qualities in His divine book. When we read about Ruth (Ruth 3:11), Dorcas (Acts 9:36), Phoebe (Romans 16:1-3), and Lois and Eunice (2 Timothy 1:5), we have pictures of what God wants His rubies to look like.

There are many chapters that uplift women, but Proverbs 31 excels them all. In fact, God asked, “Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies” (Proverbs 31:10). Virtuous means “power or strength.” The ASV has “worthy.” God looked at godly women and valued them far above one of the most precious gems on earth. Using this specific jewel, He shows her worth, beauty, and rarity. Many women do not choose this model to follow, but all women should aspire to do so. Beautifully and poetically, every verse in our text begins with a different, consecutive letter of the Hebrew alphabet.  

Proverbs 31 was inspired by God, penned by King Lemuel (Proverbs 31:1), and given to the king by his mother. We do not know who either of them are; however, It is like a mother would sit down with her son as he was interested in pursuing a relationship with a woman and say “son, I want you to find a girl like this…”[1] Perhaps this chapter also describes a specific woman. Maybe king Lemuel received principles from his mother and wrote Proverbs 31 to illustrate those principles through her! Whoever this section of Scripture is about, we do know that it describes a woman of great value. Bob Winton observed “Many husbands mistreat their wives, being ignorant of their true worth”[2]—reading Proverbs 31 will change this.

This woman is a woman of great value. She is prized, a treasure in God’s possession, and an example for young women to model and a list for young men to find in a prospect. How was this woman virtuous?

Morally (Proverbs 31:10, 26a).

While virtuous may not specifically imply godliness, in the Biblical context it does. True women are virtuous when they are first godly. This woman was worthy, wise, and wonderful. Paul told women to be dressed with righteousness when he wrote “But (which becometh women professing godliness with good works” (1 Timothy 2:10). Peter similarly scribed, "Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price. For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands” (1 Peter 3:3-5).

Unsurprisingly, Paul’s first requirement for the aged women is that “they be in behaviour as becometh holiness” (Titus 2:3).

Since she is a godly woman, she will revere God over spouse, the Bible over handbooks, and the church over community. Her direction is God first. Since she is a godly woman she will make time for personal Bible study. While she may not lead an at home Bible study or prayer, she surely is influential in the home with her knowledge. It was Timothy’s mother that taught him about the Bible (2 Timothy 1:5) and King Lemuel that received these words from the one who gave birth to him. The Proverbs’ writer specializes the “law of thy mother” (Proverbs 1:8; 6:20)—because she is a student of the law!

This woman was virtuous because she was first godly. If women are not faithful to God, she will not be faithful to her spouse, children, and perhaps even employers too. First, a virtuous woman is faithful to God.

Maritally (Proverbs 31:11-12, 23).

A second trait of the virtuous woman is that she is martially faithful in a variety of ways. While one does not have to be married to be virtuous, one, if married, does have to be faithful to their spouse if they want to be virtuous. Some women are harmful to their husbands (Proverbs 12:4b; 19:13; 21:9,19; 25:24; 27:15), but not this woman. Every relationship she attempts to entertain should be second to her closest relationship she has—with her husband. She is virtuous maritally in that she is:  

                         Trustworthy. Martin Luther said, “The greatest gift of God is a pious amiable spouse, who fears God, loves his house, and with whom one can live in perfect confidence” (Emp. mine, NO). Some women are untrustworthy. Some wives are flirtatious, sexually promiscuous, and financially irresistible. This woman was different. She could be relied upon. Trustworthiness indicates that she communicated with her husband too. Could it be said that your husband trusts his best friend over you or is it said of you that your husband “doth safely trust?” 

She seeks his benefit, not his harm. Some women overburden their husbands and therefore harm them. Some women will spend and spend and spend, draining the bank account, and leave the husband to work even harder to support his family, while other women other women demand extreme emotional attention to which the husband is burdened by her burdening dependence upon him. This woman is different. The husband is able to work outside the home because of her willingness to take care of the home.[3] She worked hard so that she would not burden her husband financially, emotionally, and spiritually. This husband did not have to overwork because of his wife’s “overspending.” This woman was frugal, selfless, and cautious. She watched what she bought and did not spend all the money on herself. Her emphasis was not on physical prosperity (cf. 1 Timoty 2:9; 1 Peter 3:3-4). Everything this woman did was for the benefit of her husband and he prospered because of her! She had his best interest in mind in every situation, in fact she made him look good.[4] Her husband does not doubt her diligence for his benefit. They were working together—they were on the same team[5] (Malachi 2:14-“companion.”). Some women try to compete against their husbands, trying to become their equal. Although they are equals spiritually, domestically, the husband leads, while the wife follows. She does not try to be better than him, instead she tries to support his betterment. The opposite disposition is founded in feminism and an utter disregard for woman’s roles. Psychologically, marriages are harmed when women attempt to compete with their husbands. She was willing to do good “all the days of her life.” This doing good will be daily, weekly, monthly, yearly—until “death do them part.” Truly, “Behind every successful man is a good woman.” “Writing of the greatness of Mr. D. L. Moody, Professor Drummond says: ‘If you were to ask Mr. Moody—which it would never occur to you to do—what, apart from the inspirations of his personal faith, was the secret of his success, of his happiness and usefulness in life, he would assuredly answer, ‘Mrs. Moody.’”[6]

He is respected by others because of his wife. Have you ever known a husband so well because of his wife? So many wives have ruined their husbands reputation because of their sensuality, gossiping mouths, or unloving spirit, but this woman helped his reputation rather than hurt it. She was a crown to her husband (Proverbs 12:4). Was he may have been known among the elders because of how good his wife talked about him with their wives? Was he known by her good character? Some women when away from their husbands can only talk ill their spouse. They cannot wait for him to leave so they can gossip to their groups about their spouses with each other. This is not reverence. Can you imagine Ruth (Ruth 3:9), Sarah (Genesis 18:12), or Bathsheba (1 Kings 1:31) talking ill of the man they loved? Wives are to revere their husbands, even when away from them (Ephesians 5:33)—this woman did just that.

Second, a virtuous woman is a faithful wife.

Domestically (Proverbs 31:15, 21, 27-28).

The importance of a mother cannot be expressed enough. Emerson said: “men are what their mothers make them.” M. Russel Ballard said, “There is no role in life that is more essential than that of motherhood.” Abraham Lincoln said, “All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.” Another piece in the jewel of the virtuous woman is how she takes care of her home as a homemaker. Although some may not be mothers yet, they can learn from this virtuous woman. Lemuel writes about the importance of her role in the home with the word “household” (31:15, 21, 27).

This woman made the home her priority. She worked hard for the household. Godly wives and mothers must make the home the priority (1 Timothy 5:14; Titus 2:5). If she doesn’t take care of the home, who will? If she neglects the duties at home, she will burden her husband. While he is the leader of the home, she is the leader of the house. Those who do not take care of the home are looked down upon in Scripture. Women who neglect the home duties, are not fulfilling a responsibility they signed up for when getting married. She must not forego her household duties for secular ones. She must be involved too (Proverbs 31:27). Have you ever had your mother know something about you before you told her?[7] Virtuous women will attend ball games, concerts, and competitions. She is aware of what her children are doing, who they hang out with, and where her husband is.

This woman was domestically industrious. A young mother and her three extremely active young boys were playing ‘cops and robbers’ one afternoon in the backyard when a neighbor stopped by. One boy aimed his pistol at his mother and yelled, ‘Bang! You are dead!’ She slumped to the ground in a heap. When she did not get up right away the neighbor hurried to see if she had been hurt in the fall. As the neighbor bent over, the overworked mother opened one eye and whispered, ‘Shh. Do not give me away. It is the only chance I get to rest!’” She valued work over sleep (Proverbs 31:15, 18b). Many wives only care about themselves, instead of preparing meals or cleaning the house. This woman sacrificed for her home. Who is the one to get up when the child is crying or the one who stays up till the son got home from a date? Did you ever wake up and breakfast is already made for you?

Because she is domestically industrious, she is prepared for life (Proverbs 31:21). This woman was not afraid of the winter because she has clothed her house in the warmth of scarlet. She was diligent to ready her household for the harm before the harm comes. Virtuous women are not lazy (Proverbs 31:27). Solomon wrote it was “Every wise woman buildeth her house” (Proverbs 14:1a). She knows what the danger of idleness can bring to her soul, her family, and others (cf. 1 Timothy 5:13).

Because of her laborious effort for the home, this virtuous woman’s children and husband praise her (Proverbs 31:28). Third, a virtuous woman is a faithful homemaker.

Occupationally (Proverbs 31:13-19, 22, 24).

Some have suggested that women cannot work outside the home—the Virtuous Woman of Proverbs 31 is evidence against that thesis. While women are to make the home their priority, they are not prohibited from working outside the home. Lydia was a seller of clothes (Acts 16:14) and Priscilla worked outside the home with her husband (Acts 18:2-3). 

This woman proves that although she worked hard for the home, her outside diligent work was still for the home! Note the diligence specified  

• “worketh willingly” (31:13).

• “she bringeth her food from afar” (31:14).

• “planteth” (31:16).

• “her candle goeth not out by night” (31:18).

• “She layeth her hands to the spindle” (31:19).

Beautifully, this woman (like many women) wore many hats. She worked with clothing (verse 13, 19, 21, 22), she was a cook (verse 15), she was a buyer (verse 16), she was a farmer (verse 16), she was a saleswomen (verse 24), and she was a teacher (verse 26). Her diligence was surely bountiful and a blessing to her household.  

Fourth, a virtuous woman may be faithful occupationally, if she works; however, remembering that her main objective is the household’s benefit.

Generously (Proverbs 31:20, 26b).

Women are God’s nurses; they make the world a kinder, happier, and enjoyable place. This woman spoke kindly. The way a woman carries herself, the words she chooses, and the actions that follow should only be that of graciousness. The word translated “kindness” could be translated as mercy. She is not a begrudging woman. Her words are of kindness because they are forgiving. Think about a mother’s words; how comforting did they sound (cf. Song of Solomon 2:14)?  Out of her mouth came the law of kindness, not gossip, slander, cursing, and inappropriate language.

She is also generous. Her labor was not only for the profit of her and her household, but She but also for the poor! Matthew Henry said, “She is as intent upon giving as she is upon getting.” Paul wrote, “Let him that stole steal no more: but rather let him labour, working with his hands the thing which is good, that he may have to give to him that needeth” (Ephesians 4:28, emp. mine, NO). This woman did not neglect spiritual obligations for domestic ones. She was like the Shummamite woman (2 Kings 4:9-11) and Tabitha (Acts 9:36).

Fifth, a virtuous woman is generous to everyone she meets.

Modestly (Proverbs 31:25, 30).

The modern idea that women must show more of their bodies to be beautiful is actually contrary to true beauty. Beauty is not defined by the body, but by character. Spiritual clothing is important (Job 29:14; Job 40:10; Psalm 132:9, 16; Romans 13:14). Paul wrote, “But (which becometh women professing godliness) with good works” (1 Timothy 2:10). Again, we reference Peter: “Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price” (1 Peter 3:3-4). This woman was virtuous because she chose to be dressed in character first before being dressed in physical beauty.[8]     

She was confident in herself. Some women are unconfident in themselves so they feel like the only way they can be confident is by the exposure of their body. The virtuous woman was confident in her ability over her body; her spiritual walk with God over a fashion show. This does not mean that physical beauty doesn’t matter and that women should not desire to be beautiful. However, it is a lie to believe that physical beauty is the most important form of beauty—it is better to let God define beautiful.

Sixth, a virtuous woman focuses on inward attractiveness before outward beauty.

The virtuous woman is more important than rubies and from these words from King Lemuel’s mother we can see why. Her own works show others who she is (Proverbs 31:31) and because of her virtue, “Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her” (Proverbs 31:28). Why? Because this woman excells all women (Proverbs 31:29). Behold God’s rubies!

Endnotes

[1]David Guzik.

[2]https://cdn.subsplash.com/documents/XJ7DGK/_source/bbfd09f7-ed6e-4954-93a9-66e206d64461/document.pdf

[3]Adam Clarke

[4]Dan Cates, notes from MSOP “Wisdom Literature,” 2022.

[5]Dan Cates, notes from MSOP “Wisdom Literature,” 2022.

[6]Biblical Illustrator.

[7]https://cdn.subsplash.com/documents/XJ7DGK/_source/ba1f1380-6a84-4a91-9425-3f6627106de3/document.pdf

[8]David Guzik.